How To Go From 'On Edge' To 'At Ease' With Being Seen Online

I’ve noticed there is a theme with many entrepreneurs. They are scared of being visible as they market their business, particularly online. I’ve had this same fear myself and I think it’s important for us to talk about it. While you might not be scared and holding yourself back at this moment there will come a time when you will nervous about being seen.

When we know people may read what we’ve written it can feel like we’re naked in a spotlight, exposed to criticism and ridicule.  You might feel so vulnerable that you hold yourself back from commenting on a Facebook post, publishing a blog, building a website or (probably the biggest fear-inducing) recording a video.

Online marketing is a very effective way for you to build your business. So what do you do? It feels sooooooooo….nerve-wracking, spine curling and stomach churning. And you might feel like running into your home, slamming the door, closing the curtains and hiding under the bed.  Rest assured you are not alone. Most people with an online presence have fought against the feeling of overexposure too.

And there is one very big problem that comes from staying safe. 

If you are not visible your clients can’t find you. 

If you have a passion to be a successful entrepreneur, you need an online presence. If your ideal clients can’t find you, your business will fail.

Let’s shine a light on why we feel so vulnerable and share a few ideas of how to get past this fear.

Here’s what other online business owners have shared with me. They are most scared about:

-Criticism or Ridicule

-Being compared (unfavourably) with others

-Embarrassment. Awkwardly making a fool of yourself

Criticism or Ridicule

What if you post on your Facebook business page and someone doesn’t agree with you?

Well, let’s think about this for a minute.

If it’s your Facebook Page you can decide to keep good personal boundaries. People are allowed to have a different opinion; constructive discussion is powerful. But there is a difference between a difference of opinion and an aggressive attack. Those pages are like your business’ home on the web, if you wouldn’t tolerate that behaviour for a guest in your home, why would tolerate it on the internet?

You are able to moderate the comments on your blog and your social media sites. If someone is attacking you personally, I recommend you take swift action. Ban, block and delete those posts and move on.

Being Compared (Unfavorably) With Others

Let’s set this straight, 99% of the time this happens it is you comparing yourself unfavourably with others.  It’s your Inner Critic playing the comparison game with you. And the aim of the Inner Critic is always to keep you small, safe and scared. The Inner Critic knows if you don’t ever try you can never succeed.

Ask yourself, am I comparing my beginning with someone else’s middle or advanced skills? Perhaps this is your first iteration of a website and you are comparing it with an expert’s 6^th version of their website. There are places where you can look up some of the online master’s early websites for a giggle.  Try Wayback Machine here https://archive.org/ it will give you some great insights.

Embarrassment

Ok, I admit it. I hate making a fool of myself. Oh!!!!! Did I just say that out loud????

The point is, no one wants to look like a fool in public. Usually, we’re so busy trying to keep our outward appearance all shiny and polished we’re too busy to notice what anyone else is doing.

I’ve observed when I see someone who looks nervous on video or uncomfortable while they are giving a speech, I inwardly applaud their courage. Also, I respect them for trying and learning. So trying something new, even if you’re not an expert may have the complete opposite effect. Instead of judgement, you may find respect and encouragement. 

If you’re a beginner at doing videos, public speaking or writing, begin by getting in touch with your message and the impact you want to have on your audience. Do you have something important to say, something that can really help them?  Will their lives be better because of your message?  Once you shift your focus from being worried about how nervous you are to how much you want to help your audience you will find the fear of embarrassment will evaporate.

So now it’s your turn.  What other questions do you have about being a successful coach? Send me an email at info@candymotzek.com  I’d love to hear from you, I personally read every single email I get, and maybe I’ll answer your question in one of my blogs.