Episode 14: Meet Your Future Self. Use Mindset To Reach Your Goals

Transcript:

Hey Friends, How are you today? I’m so pleased that you’re here. Welcome to Episode 14.  

Let me tell you what’s going on with me. I’m in full on learning mode with Instagram stories. I love a challenge, and learning new tech is fun.  I don’t know about you, do you like learning new techy things or not?  I know some of you get freaked out learning new tech or a new platform 

Listen, it’s normal to be nervous at times and I’m curious about this fear of learning tech. I wonder why so many people avoid learning how to use new tools and platforms. 

What do you think? 

If you’re one of those people, it’s a great opportunity for you to get curious too and ask yourself, coach yourself.  You can even do a thought download.  Grab a piece of paper and at the top of the page write the new tech thing. Maybe it’s IG stories like me, or Pinterest or zoom or iPhone.  Then write all the thoughts that come up for you. The good, the bad and the ugly. Get them out of your brain and onto paper.  

Listen, no one says you have to learn how to do all these things as a new coach or a new entrepreneur. You can totally build a business and get help with the tech but if you’re curious and you would like to use more tech then ask yourself, what’s going on here? Why am I so nervous? What do I think will happen? You may find out it’s as simple as worrying about other people’s opinions or that you won’t look professional. 

Let me know what you find out, send me a note. You can do this by going to the episode webpage and adding a comment or a DM on Instagram. 

Now if you’re curious about my stories, check me out on IG I’m @candymotzek. These stories are a sneak peek into my life. It’s a chance for you to get to know me, the real me, a little bit better. 

Today we’re talking about your Future Self. If you’re reading this you’ll see that Future Self is capitalized. Yes, I think it’s that important. 

Why are we talking about future you? Oh, I’m so glad you asked. 

Future You has already reached the goal your going after. Has the life and experiences that you would love to have. The ones that you will have. They’ve already done it, they’ve learned the lessons and grown into becoming the person you want to be. Remember too, who you are today is a dream or a goal you’ve already brought to life. 

She (or he) has a lot of knowledge; they’ve gained experience all along the way and they are ready to share it with you.  Does this sound a little bit crazy?  Oh well, it does sound a little woo but it’s true stick with me and you’ll see what I mean. 

Future Self has accomplished what you want. They’re a coach, they have paying coaching clients, they’re making money and having a positive impact on the world. They are paid to do something they love. They have meaningful success. 

Sounds pretty good right? 

Let me get a little meta on you here. You today, the one you’d see if you looked in the mirror, right now. She was Future You at one point. Think of all you’ve learned, how do you feel, what are you thinking about your life right now? I would encourage you to say a silent thank you to your past self. I bet you, the right now you, has done some amazing things and you’re a pretty incredible person too. 

Have you been going to the gym regularly and now you’re strong. Do you meditate most mornings and start the day feeling energized and centered? Did you read bedtime stories to your kids when they were younger and now you’ve got a good relationship? 

If you, the today you, spoke to you from 5 years ago. What would you say about going to the gym, meditating, or reading to your kids? I bet you would have a lot to say. 

For example, you might say, “stick with it, you’ve got this”, or “I know you don’t feel like it and that this is hard but you can do hard things and it will be worth it”. Or you might say, “don’t worry when you miss a day or two, just start again, don’t quit, I believe in you.” 

It’s easy to think about it from this perspective, the today you taking to the you from the past. 

But now let’s shift our perspective.  The Future You who has the coaching clients you want, she knows stuff. She knows exactly how it all came together, she knows where there were struggles and how long it took to overcome them. She knows a lot. 

And you can ask for her help today. Because you might be surprised to know that you can tap into her and ask her for help right now. She’s here for you. 

Sure, like I said before this might feel a little woo, and it is, but it’s also extremely practical. 

Here’s why. 

We’re used to asking others to solve our problem. We rely on outside opinions, recommendations and instructions far more than we trust ourselves. 

I’m recommending that we learn how to learn from us and that we trust ourselves and start by asking us what we think.

 We’re used to the academic style of learning, someone else has the answer and we need to discover it outside of ourselves. Or we need to memorize and regurgitate what we memorized and call that learning. 

This is different, we learn from ourselves and it works. 

So, here’s what to do: 

Decide what it is you want. It doesn’t have to be something far in the future, it could be something next month, next week or even tomorrow. 

Maybe it’s your first paying client. Maybe it’s filling and running a training. Maye it’s creating connection with Instagram stories. It can be anything you want. Use these techniques with everything in your life. But we’re focused on you becoming a coach so I’m going to stick with these examples for today. 

Ok now that you’ve chosen something, Here’s what to do 

First take a breath and relax. 

Now imagine that it’s done, You might need to close your eyes to do this. Go ahead. You’re in the middle of that first paid coaching session with your new client. Imagine this, it’s your life. Feel how you will feel and know that it will happen, for sure it will happen that you get your first paying client. 

Still relaxed? Good. Put a little smile on your face as you imagine being in that coaching session. 

Now ask yourself, what did I do to create this? Remember, you have already achieved it, so now answer yourself. 

Grab a piece of paper and write out the answers. If you’ve been with me for the past couple of months you know that I’m always saying grab a piece of paper and a pen. The reason I recommend it is because it is so helpful. If you’ve got time, pause the episode now and get your paper, if you not come back to the recording and do this work. Carve out a few minutes and write it for yourself, listening is interesting but when you take action, that’s when these episodes will really help you transform your life. 

Ok you’re back, what did you write. A few things, a big, long list, both are good. If you’re not used to learning from yourself and you feel a little stuck, it’s ok to guess. (yes, you heard me, just guess :-) )

Next, how did you feel while you were taking these actions the ones, you’re your Future Self told you about? The actions that created that paid coaching session that you’re experiencing in your imagination right now. 

Choose a couple of emotion words that reflect your emotional space and write them down too. 

Finally, ask yourself, what was I thinking while I was feeling this way and taking this action? Write your thoughts next. They are probably quite simple like. ‘This is working’.” I’m so glad to be here.” “ I love coaching” 

And then go do those things. Think the thoughts, feel the enthusiasm or whatever emotion you captured and take the action that you wrote down. 

It seems simple and it is, but it’s not always easy, it’s a different way of working towards your goals, it’s the way of mindset. 

If you’re listening, know that I believe in you and I know this stuff works. Give it a try!

 Now let me give you a specific example so you can see how it works in real time.

 Your goal is to get your first paying client. 

Breathe and imagine you are in your coaching session with that client. Close your eyes. Your goal is complete, it’s done.  

 Imagine how you will feel, I bet you feel something like satisfied or proud. Relax and enjoy that feeling. 

Now ask yourself, what did I do to sign this client?   

Perhaps you realize you did a couple of things. Something like 

I spoke to my friends and told them about becoming a coach. 

And 

I took a class and when I introduced myself a couple people wanted to know more about coaching, so I told them. 

How did you feel while taking those actions? Your response might be enthusiastic, (because I was excited about coaching) 

When you’re feeling enthusiastic, what were you thinking.? 

These four thoughts: 

• This is great other people need to experience coaching too
• Coaching changed my life
• I love coaching.
• I’m finally doing something just for me, it’s so much fun.

So now you know, you’ve learned from yourself, you consulted with your Future Self, and this is the place to start. 

Now you know what to do.  

Remind yourself to think those four thoughts.

• This is great other people need to experience coaching too
• Coaching changed my life
• I love coaching.
• I’m finally doing something just for me, it’s so much fun.

And notice the feeling of enthusiasm as you think them. 

And then go do those things. Take a class and introduce yourself. Talk to your friends. 

This is not a once and done exercise. Creating and cultivating a relationship with Future You takes time. Enjoy it, do it every day. Ask Future You the same question or a new question tomorrow learn from yourself. You’re the authority in your own life and every time you do this you’ll know what to do next. 

This is not some magic incantation that you do once and magically you reach your goals. No, but it is the way to get what you want and reach your goal. 

You get to do it over and over, it’s the practical application of The Model, (I explained this to you in Episode11) you know what you want. That’s the result, You know that to get the result you need to do stuff, and that how you’re feeling while you’re in the doing that stuff will affect the result. So, you want to choose what you do and how you feel while you’re doing it. That’s why you look for the thoughts that create the feelings that temper the action so you can get the results you want. 

Your Future Self has the result you want, has the goal. Big or small. Don’t hesitate to ask for his help, he’s waiting for you. 

Hey hope you join me again next week I’m diving into your purpose and why you are a coach. 

So that’s it for today friends. But don’t leave yet! I want to tell you about a gift I offer to all my listeners. It’s my free resource library, an online vault filled with content I created to help you grow and become a coach.  I call it The Coaches Online Business Academy and here’s how it works. 

When you sign up for your free account, you get immediate access to all of my free resources and yeah there’s a lot of them, and it keeps growing every month! You can dive into my ‘narrow down your niche’ quiz. Then jump into the 5-day video training to kickstart your coaching business. There are a whole bunch of PDF guides and checklists. Including 147 proven coaching niches, a checklist for what you need to know as a brand-new coach and ideas for where to find paying clients ….plus more.  

Like I said, each month I add more free resources and you’ll get notified as soon as I load them.  It really makes me happy to share this with you. It’s one of the ways I support my community and support the growth of coaching. 

All you have to do, is go to the episode description or the show notes and click on the link to sign up today. And that’s it. I’ll talk to you next week.

Featured on The Show: 

• Free Resource Library: The Coaches Online Business Academy
• Episode 11: The Model
• Click here to find out how to work with me

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Correction: This episode refers to "The Model." I'd like to rectify any errors or omissions by giving proper attribution and credit to the originators, Dr. Albert Ellis, who formulated REBT (Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy), and Dr. Aaron Beck, who incorporated it into CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). "The Model" and references to CTFAR should be more accurately referred to as "The CBT Model." CBT is a widely recognized and effective approach that helps individuals understand how their thought processes impact their daily lives.