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The Model: Your Thoughts Create Your Life Ep: 011



Hey Welcome, I’m so glad to see you here. Here we are on Episode 11. Since the start of this podcast, I’ve briefly mentioned The Model – since it’s the foundation for much of how I recommend you do your thought work let me give you a quick overview. The mindset of becoming a coach is the most important thing. It helps you to feel better and take better more congruent action.

Well when you think of this Model, it’s like a ladder.  It talks about how we create results in our life. It was codified by Brooke Castillo, She didn’t create it, what she did was systematize / classify the way the world works so that it could be used to help us gain awareness of our mind.

The Model is very similar to CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). I went to The Google for a quick definition to share with you. here’s what it said, CBT works by changing people's attitudes and their behavior by focusing on the thoughts, images, beliefs and attitudes and how these processes relate to the way a person behaves.

Now most of us are used to taking action. We are “doers”, overachievers, strivers;….when in doubt we get stuff done. But we don’t always get the results we expect. The Model explains why.

 Let me explain it to you.

There are 5 components (5 rungs on this ladder) to The Model, they are Circumstances, Thoughts, Feelings/Emotions, Actions and Results.

 The ladder looks like this:

At the top we write C for Circumstance. 

On the next line down we write T for Thoughts 

Then on the next line below we write F for Feelings 

Below Feelings we write an A for Action and at the bottom of the ladder we write

R for Results. 

Now let me explain each of these rungs to you.

C – is neutral, it’s data. It’s something that if you and I both looked at it, we would agree. For example, if you stand on the scale there will be a number. Maybe it’s 150 lbs. You and I would both look at the number and agree…it says 150. Or maybe we look at the thermostat in your home and see that it read 72 degrees. We would both look and we would both agree. More examples of circumstances are your bank balance and the number of coaching clients you have today. 

The next line down, is T. It stands for your thoughts. These are your thoughts or opinions about that Circumstance.  I  talked a bit about your thoughts in Episode #2 and I gave you a great 5-minute exercise to get clear on what is going on in your mind. You use the Thought Download 5 minutes a day to “clean out the junk drawer of your habit thoughts” or you can use it anytime you’re feeling frustrated, angry, confused, overwhelmed. Any time you’ve got what I would classify as a negative emotion to get clarity and give yourself some space to calm down.

What do you think about 150lbs.  If you’ve been losing weight you might be thinking “wow I’ve lost so much weight” if you haven’t weighed yourself in a while and you’ve been eating a bunch of junk food while emotional bingeing you might think “holy crap I’ve gained a bunch of weight” or if you’ve been that weight for awhile you might look at the number and say “yep, I still weigh 150lbs, just as I expected”. Same number three possible different thoughts or opinions about this number. 

Your thoughts drive your feelings. What you think creates an emotion, every time. Now you’ve heard me talk about the connection between our thoughts, feelings and action when I outlined my Confident Coaches Success Framework. And here we are again, we are often used to numbing our feelings and many of you won’t have a large “feeling” vocabulary. Don’t worry you don’t need to to make good use of the model, it’s a super practical tool. 

You can start with asking yourself “do I feel good, bad or neutral”. 

Each of the 3 thoughts about 150lbs on the scale will create a different emotion. wow I’ve lost so much weight” might make you feel proud, holy crap I’ve gained a bunch of weight” might make you feel embarrassed or mad, yep, I still weigh 150lbs, just as I expected” might make you feel neutral.

Your feelings are created by your thoughts. Change how you think and you directly affect your emotions. Now why is this important?

Your emotions drive your actions (or inaction). If you’re feeling inspired and enthusiastic you will take different action than if you’re disappointed or furious. 

Just think about the woman looking at 150lobs on the scale. If you’re feeling proud, you will stand up tall cause you’re feeling good. When it’s time to make dinner you will remember you’re eating healthy and want to keep feeling good so you make good choices.  

But if you’re feeling sad and dejected when it’s time to make dinner you might think – why bother. I’ll just grab whatever and sit on the couch and watch TV while I scarf it down. Both women are eating dinner, each taking action from a different emotion. It’s pretty easy to imagine the woman who feels proud is going to create results that reflect that good feeling – a healthy vibrant body. The woman who is sad may just sit on the couch and eat chips and then pull the blanket over her head…. 

Now sometimes the action is “in-action”. We choose to not do something, not exercise, not drink water, not make that phone call, not invite someone to be a coaching client. We procrastinate, delay, avoid…..all of these “in – actions” create another result. One that we probably don’t really want 

So do you see how this works? How you think about something in your life changes how you feel and those emotions drive your action (or inaction). 

The sum of your actions creates your results. In the 150lb example. If you keep eating healthy you may improve your overall health even more,  maybe the result is much better managed Type 2 diabetes, or consistent reduction in your blood pressure, or maybe you feel courageous enough to put your name forward for a speaking gig.

If you continue to eat unhealthily and eat more than your body needs, the number on the scale may go up. You might need to buy some larger clothes. You may find out you have pre-diabetes. 

All of these potential results are a direct result of the actions you’ve taken. Which were spurred by how you were feeling and what you are thinking.

See what I mean, just like in previous episodes where I spoke about the thought feeling action triad….here it’s showing up again. How you think creates your results.

If you want to know why something isn't working look at your thoughts, because the model is always working. 

So throughout all of the future episodes anytime we’re talking about the ups and downs of becoming a coach we will also talk about your mindset. 

Because how you think specifically what you are thinking and what you’re feeling is key to help you take the best, most inspired action to get the results you want. A calendar full of amazing clients, and a thriving coaching practice.

Really any problem fits into this model and I can't wait to show you guys how all that works including how you sign clients and start to fill your coaching business. 

Please make sure that you hit the subscribe button and that way you will get all future podcasts into your podcast app. Then also you know it would really, really help and be amazing is if you could leave a review for me on iTunes Apple Podcasts. That would be fantastic. 

Between now and the next episode, I’d encourage you to think about this Model. Do you see how it works, do you see how you could use this understanding to help you as a coach. 

I’d love to hear from you – and I hope this is super useful. I’m here with you to walk with you every step of the way. 

Hey, If you do not have someone who is helping you walk through the step by step through the process of setting up your coaching business please reach out to me and let’s have a conversation. You can click on the link in the show notes. 

So that’s it for today, before I wrap this up, I want to tell you about a my free membership site that I created to help you start your business and become a coach.  It’s called The Coaches Online Business Academy and here’s how it works. 

When you sign up for your free account you will have immediate access to a whole bunch of resources and it’s all free. I’ve got a quiz to help you narrow down your niche, a pre-recorded 5-day training to kickstart your coaching business, and a lot of PDF guides. Including 147 proven coaching niches, a checklist for what you need to do as a brand-new coach just starting out and ideas for places to find paying clients plus more.  

Each month I’ll be adding more free resources to this vault. You only need to sign up once and you’ll get access to all the resources and all the new ones as I add them too.  It’s a really valuable offer, and I’m so pleased to be able to gift it to you.

Click on the link in the show notes and sign up today.

We’ll talk to you soon.

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Correction: This episode refers to "The Model." I'd like to rectify any errors or omissions by giving proper attribution and credit to the originators, Dr. Albert Ellis, who formulated REBT (Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy), and Dr. Aaron Beck, who incorporated it into CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). "The Model" and references to CTFAR should be more accurately referred to as "The CBT Model." CBT is a widely recognized and effective approach that helps individuals understand how their thought processes impact their daily lives.

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